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Thursday, April 12, 2012

Manage Anger at Home

Manage Anger at Home

Ephesians 4: 26 “In your anger do not sin”: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry,

Everyone gets angry sometimes, it's a natural part of life. The good news is that you can learn to manage that anger and be in control, so you can use anger effectively and safely at home.

When your anger only lasts a short time, you'll feel more in control and less stressed. As your stress management improves, your success is soon to follow.

Being joyful, instead of angry, is healthier for you and it's better for the people around you. When you find that you're feeling rather aggravated, there are things you can do to keep from getting frustrated and saying or doing something you'll regret later. However, with that said, anger is okay to express when it's appropriate to do so. The key is to be able to identify when anger is justified and when it's unnecessary.

Work on Tempering Your Anger with Peace

Being peaceful can be hard work at first, but the hard work is worth it. Anger may feel like the natural response to stress, simply because you've been reacting that way for so long. The people who share your home may expect you to get angry, too, and they may respond to situations in ways that seem to trigger your frustrated responses.

Changing the way you do things is a process that takes some time. You may feel like giving up, but continue to work at cultivating a peaceful mindset. Challenges will always be a part of your life, but you can deal with them in an effective and productive manner when you approach them from a position of peace and control.

There are several ways to avoid anger at home. Practice these ideas or come up with your own. The important thing to remember is that learning to remain peaceful is a process that takes time. Be patient with yourself and enjoy the process as you begin to adopt new patterns of thinking and behavior that support your family's well-being.

Try these strategies when you start to get angry:

· Breathe deeply and slowly until you calm down before you say or do anything at all.

· Think about the things you love about a person, instead of what makes you angry.

· Talk things over with someone, instead of telling them what they will and must do.

· Be sensitive to another person's fears, goals, desires, and important differences.

· Walk away for a while before you have a conversation with someone who upset you.

· Be clear about what's expected of everyone, including you, to lessen conflict.

Anger is a Roadblock to your Success as a Family

In some families, the anger people feel leads to yelling, unfruitful arguing, and an erosion of the relationships within that family. You can make a better choice. Instead of harsh words, choose to calm down and focus on solutions that take everyone's needs into account.

Include your family in decision-making. Ensure that everyone's input is taken into account when deciding on the best course of action to take. Consider the feelings of everyone in your family and seek to meet each other's needs as well as your own. When you do, your family will be happier and closer, and you'll experience less anger and more peace in your home!

Thursday, April 5, 2012

Filial Piety - Do we know what it is?

Filial Piety - Do we know what it is?

Exodus 20:12 “Honor your father and your mother, so that you may live long in the land the LORD your God is giving you.

Eph 6:1-2 Children, obey your parents the way the Lord wants, because this is the right thing to do. The command says, “You must respect your father and mother.”That is the first command that has a promise with it.That promise is: “Then everything will be fine with you, and you will have a long life on the earth.”

The photos and video of Ting Tsu-chi carrying his mother to the hospital have gone viral. (Internet photo)

Filial piety has become a hot issue in Taiwan after video of a middle-aged man carrying his frail mother into the Chi Mei Hospital went viral, touching hearts all over the country. Now people want to know more about the man in the video.

On Sunday, the local Apple Daily confirmed the man's identity as Ting Tsu-chi, who retired from the Bureau of Investigation in the southern city of Tainan five years ago. He applied for early retirement in order to take care of his elderly mother. Three days ago, the video of Ting carrying his seriously ill mother to see doctors was reposted on the net repeatedly. Many netizens have dubbed him "the model of filial piety," and other users said he is the "25th filial exemplar," with his story titled, "He wrapped his mother in cotton cloth." The 24 Filial Exemplars is a classic text written on filial piety by Guo Jujing during the Yuan dynasty (1271-1368).

Ting Tsu-chi, 62, has stayed mum on the incident, and when reporters asked his former colleagues to ask him for an interview, he told his friends to tell the reporters, "These are my personal affairs, I would rather not."

His neighbors said they have hardly any interaction with Ting so they don't have any impression of him, yet when looking at the photo of him carrying his mother to the hospital, one neighbors said, "It's incredible to see such a scene in today's world."

Ting talked to his former boss Mo Tien-hu, currently the chief of the Tainan Bureau of Investigation, about the incident in a phone call, saying his mother has had a stroke and can't move well, and last month she broke her leg. Ting reportedly said that because his mother is fragile and thin, sitting in a wheelchair would be not suitable for her, as her broken leg could be hurt if it bumped into anything. He decided using a wrapping cloth to carry his mother would be the best option to take her into the hospital.

According to Mo, Ting's father died in 2006 and his mother was depressed after losing her husband. She asked Ting to take her back to mainland China to see relatives, and he complied. At the time, he was up for promotion at the Bureau of Investigation, but he passed it up to take care of his parents.

''When I was small, you carry me; When you grow old, I carry you'' ........one newspaper commended as saying. These words touched many a heart.

''Filial piety'' is deeply embraced in ancient Chinese culture, teachings and philosophy. Keep sharing this beautiful story with your friends........

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PS:The devoted son took his mother to the hospital again on March 5, where she stayed for 10 days. She passed away on the 15th. Click here for updated news.

Wednesday, April 4, 2012

Cultivate Relationships

Relationships are important.

Romans 12:10

Love one another with brotherly affection. Out do one another in showing honour.

Relationships give us the support we need when we're down. They provide others we can laugh with. In times of grief or illness, we have people to lean on. Relationships can often be a source of tremendous blessing if you're willing to give of yourself for the relationship.

Focus on the People You Care About

Focus on those you love and care about. When others see that you're interested in them and what they have going on in their lives, they'll open up and be more caring to you, in most cases. That establishes a good, strong friendship.

When you focus on someone else, participate in some of the things that they enjoy. Take an interest in their activities and career. When you do, you'll begin to see things from their perspective and enjoy a deeper, more meaningful friendship.

Get Close to the People Who Matter

Getting closer means different things to different people. Some people move to be closer to family, for example. Others live far away but use the phone and internet to stay close and in touch. They tell each other they care and remain close in spirit and heart even when they're far apart. Relationships take effort, but the rewards are well worth it.

If you really want to stay close to loved ones and expand your personal relationships, you have to be willing to get outside of your comfort zone. A friend may have something he does for a hobby that you have yet to try. You might meet new people and build on the number of relationships you have in your life.

No matter how close your relationships are now, you can become closer by:

1. Talking to the people in your life. What do they need from you?

2. Thinking about your relationships. What do you need from others?

3. Sharing what matters. Express your thoughts, opinions, and values and be open to those of others.

4. Eliminating negativity from your relationships. Regardless of the type of relationship you have, whether business or personal, it should be positive, with both of you getting something good out of the relationship.

5. Letting others know you care. You might assume that those close to you know you care, but the other person may be waiting to hear that they're important to you. Tell the people you care about how you feel as often as you can. Show them you care. Actions speak even louder than words.

6. Spending time with them. Spend as much time with them as you can, too. Time is a precious commodity, and spending your time with someone shows them that they're important to you. Use the time you spend together to get all the enjoyment and fulfillment you can from each of your relationships.

Changing the dynamics of a relationship you care about often takes time and patience. To get more from your personal relationships, spend some time evaluating them. Then, begin to pour your time and energy into the ones that mean the most to you.

Consider forging new personal relationships, as well as strengthening old ones. It's perfectly okay to have a lot of friends, as long as you have the time to cultivate the relationships that you have with them.

Tuesday, April 3, 2012

Five Simple Ways To Be A Better Spouse

Genesis 2:24
That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh.

Marriage can be the greatest blessing of your life, but it takes a lot of work to maintain a close, vibrant relation
ship for a long time. Sometimes it seems as though the odds are against the success of your marriage.

By taking these simple steps, you can continue to experience the intimacy and fulfillment you crave within your marital relationship:

1. Accept your spouse's faults. Your spouse may be perfect for you, but they will make mistakes. Everyone has their faults, and a healthy marriage relationship is built on forgiveness and an environment of safety where you can be who you are without fear. Seek to create that environment and watch your relationship blossom.

Remember that having different interests is healthy. Celebrate your differences. Seek to enjoy the things your spouse is interested in, and your spouse will likely show more interest in your passions. Show that what's important to them is important to you also, and your significant other will have no doubt that you love them.

2. Be willing to compromise. In marriage, it's important to pick your battles wisely.

Some of the things you do will annoy each other, but it's important to provide the grace and compassion that makes the other person feel valued. Be willing to give up your way on the small things, and your spouse will likely reciprocate.

3. Ensure both parties contribute. Marriage is a two-person system. Having just one person run everything will make things challenging for both of you. Whether it's the bills or chores around the house, divide the tasks so that you make it easy for both of you.

This is also true for recreation. When deciding how to spend your time together, take turns choosing what to do. If you have a movie night, make it a double feature so that each person is guaranteed a movie that they enjoy.

The 50/50 rule is a good basis for this. With this set-up, both partners play their part in the relationship and no one is superior to the other. As it should be, both become equal partners in the relationship.

4. Show them that you care. A lot of times, when a couple has been together for a long time, they settle into a routine and forget the little things. Each person in the relationship assumes that the other knows how he or she feels. Instead, date your spouse like you did when you first got together. You'll be shocked at the results.

Show your appreciation and love for your spouse in small, everyday ways. When you do this consistently, you will notice a dramatic improvement in your marriage almost overnight. Small, inexpensive, thoughtful gifts throughout the year say more about your affection than one large gift on your anniversary. Say: "thank you" and "I love you" often.

5. Common courtesy is king. When in doubt, use the golden rule. Treat your spouse how you wish to be treated. Be considerate and thoughtful. Always be looking for new ways to express your love.

Be supportive of your spouse. When he feels down, do what you can to let him know you stand behind him. When she's had a rough day, pamper her and show her through your actions that she matters to you more than anyone else in this world.

Marriage can be a complicated road sometimes, but it can also be the source of tremendous happiness and joy for both of you. Start today to take small steps, commit to loving your spouse with all your heart, and savor a marriage filled with passion, excitement, and a fulfilling journey through life together.